10.06.2008

Seize the Day


Have you ever felt as if your life consisted of nothingness? Sometimes it seems as if I sit around all day doing nothing—I may even work out, have a productive school day, get caught up on all of the laundry that tends to sprawl itself all over the house, or get my room extra clean—but somehow, some days, I’m still left with this feeling of dissatisfaction…What could I be doing wrong?

Fall is beginning to wrap its fingers around the earth. Eventually it will turn the leaves different colors, dry up the grass, and send chilly winds our way, but for now it’s just an exciting electric sensation that tells me what is happening. This time of year always makes me want to sit by an open window and read a favorite book. Relaxation seems to come with the package of autumn. Unfortunately, I’ve found that I have very little time for reading….why? Well, when I have a bit of free time I don’t take the time to go and make myself a warm cappuccino, cozy up in a sweater, and sit by my open window to read with a candle sending its spiced scent through my dimly lit bedroom. As appealing as this sounds when I think about it, my initial reaction to free time is to get my eager fingers on my computer.

Sometimes this can be a very enjoyable and beneficial activity, but I’ve also found that I get sucked into whatever it is I’m doing to the point of not being able to get away from it, even after I’m finished with the productive part of my internet surfing. I sit, in a sort of trance, strangely bored all of the sudden. I find myself searching for something… anything to pass the time. This is typically the point when my brain goes into what I like to call “dead time”. My eyes droop slightly, my mouth hangs open, my posture becomes absurd, and if you asked me a question, chances are you would get a very short and dry answer (without even a glance in your direction), just for lack of interest in anything outside of my little bubble, which consists of me and my laptop.

I’m not saying this to bash the internet altogether—after all it’s not the culprit here. My trouble is that my priorities get all jumbled up. Time I could use to read, spend some quality time with Christ, play a card game with my momma or one of my siblings, dance around with my one year old brother to “The Bare Necessities” music, or yes, even scream out Phantom of the Opera music with my crazy sister, is wasted on my computer. My relationships with those I love aren’t being fed and enjoyed while sitting at my computer. Doing “real life” activities (no matter how silly they may be) with my family is one of the most rewarding things I can do for myself, but it also shows my family how much I care about and love them.

We live in an age of online networking—whether it be for social needs, gaming, cooking, decorating, organizing, blogging, shopping, or simply taking in as much information about the world as you possibly can by browsing Yahoo news, IMDB (Internet Movie Database), or Wikipedia. The internet is an excellent resource for all of this. I do much of my research for school assignments, keep up with friends, search for new and interesting music, and look for good movies to see. I enjoy reading a good blog or devotion to encourage the growth of my relationships, etc. The problem appears when I start spending too much time on the internet doing things that I don’t have to do. This happens very easily, because it takes extra effort to plan my day with more varied activities—effort I don’t automatically take the time to put forth. The computer is at my disposal at all hours.

When I purpose in my mind to spend more time doing the things that will mean more in the future, I feel a lot better about my day and when I do get on the computer it doesn’t feel like such a waste of time.
Today I’ve determined to make that effort…to go the extra mile to make my day more rewarding. I’m going to take the time to do crazy stuff with my family, try a new recipe, play a game, watch a good movie, read a book, listen to some music (lyrics or no lyrics, really listen to it and try and gain some insight from it), experience new things, take a walk on a beautiful day—savor the beauty in real life and spend time with the people around me. As I spend more time doing these things, I’ll likely become addicted to the simple joys that make life beautiful. Maybe then I won’t get so easily caught up in my online persona. Carpe diem!

3 comments. :

Kaly said...

I enjoyed reading this post, and one thing come to my mind....-She is talking about me!!!! indeed I feel that very same way...I guess we have to arranje time for a little of everything that makes us feel good and enjoy life.
big kiss
Clara (kaly from DS)

Paulette said...

Boy have you said a mouth full! It is all so true! Each time I pull myself away, I find three more things to keep my interest.
Here is to hands on experiences!

Abigail Kraft said...

Thanks for your comments kaly and paulette! Glad you can identify with me. :) Hope to hear more thoughts from you on future posts!

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