3.11.2009

Meet Calvin

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When I was a little girl, I loved to go outside and search for bugs. I'd pull up the bricks which we'd laid around our garden and look for rolly pollies and earth worms. I kept grasshoppers and caterpillars in little bug catchers. I even had a pet caterpillar for three days, whom I named Willy. After he died, I had a funeral for him; in lieu of a grave stone, I drew a picture of Willy eating a leaf and wrote a short poem, which, regretfully, I cannot remember.

In the back corner of the exterior of our house, just near the corner of our wrap-around porch, there were always hundreds of bugs gathered together. I don't know why they all went there, but they stayed there practically all spring and summer! I loved to watch them move, and the sheer number of them made the tomboy inside of me buzz with excitement.

Let me tell you, ladies and gentlemen...things have changed.


Meet Calvin...


I discovered Calvin in the kitchen late one evening, crawling into my cup of coffee. Unfortunately for him, I don't like bugs anymore. In case you can't make out what's in this picture...

  • Cayenne pepper

  • Dawn dish soap

  • Vinegar

  • Coffee

  • Calvin--after taking a lighter and a steak knife to him.

Note: I'm not a proponent of the mindless torture of innocent bugs, but: 1) Calvin was not innocent, and 2) Calvin would not die!



R.I.P. Calvin.

20 comments. :

Lynnette Kraft said...

Oh Abigail that WAS funny! I'd seen your picture of Calvin before, but I'm not sure I ever knew your story.
RIP Calvin - Abigail will NOT miss you! :)
HA HA HA HA! Pictures tell all...

Lucy said...

I have visions of you waving your lighter and steak knife, with a slightly crazed look in your eyes...lol.

Hey, my memories this week are creepy crawly related, too! Obvious that we are both country girls!

Tracy P. said...

I sure hope Calvin's friends got the message! That is too cute. No one messes with my coffee and gets away with it either.

Jamimania said...

Oh my goodness Abigail, I had no idea that you have such violent tendencies!! *wink* ha ha. What a hilarious story. I think Ciara would probably do something similar, especially if a bug was intruding on her precious cup of tea or coffee. :) This was one tough bug if it took all those methods to "put him down". I'll probably giggle all day thinking about you with a lighter and steak knife... oh... and Calvin. *grin* I love your stories!! Have a fantastic day, is it cold there too? UGH, winter weather here again. I'm so ready for spring and the outdoors - but we all know what that means... BUGS! :)

Sarah Robbins said...

That is hilarious! It reminds me of my husband chasing a bug around our house with one of my leopard print high heels!

If I had my way, we would catch all the bugs and release them again outdoors. My hubby says they would just make their way back in- thus the exterminator!

Pen to Paper; Spirit to Soul said...

That is funny!!! My girls are city girls but still loved bugs and you reminded me of butterflies and crickets that expired within days and oh, the tears that flowed afterwards!!!

Roaches, however, are not bugs, they are a nuisance!!! Good riddance, Calvin!!!

Julie said...

That's hilarious! Bugs are fine outside, but once they come into MY house it's time to say bye-bye!

CornFedMama said...

This is great. Reminds me of a little mini "crime scene". But i can't stop laughing at the various methods you used to try to get the job done! I would have went for the wad of paper towels first. That stops 'em every time. That and a good squeeze! :)

Paula said...

That is so funny.....my youngest son, who is now 33 was afraid of spiders. When one got in the bathtub he would drown it in shaving cream...I used to find little piles of the stuff all the time. Thanks for helping me to remember that!

Caleb Howell said...

ok, this post made me giggle like a schoolgirl. i'm not proud of that, but you should be. lol.

Kelly @ The Beauty of Sufficient Grace said...

This is so funny Abigail... had me cracking up!

Becca said...

Oh my goodness!! That is too funny. Thanks for the laugh!!

mrosev14 said...

Cayenne pepper? Is that a method of bug killing? I can't say I blame you though. Here I am a vegetarian who really doesn't even like thinking about anything alive dying; however, I can't say I'd say the same if I found it in my coffee. Not cool. :)

Linda said...

Oh Abigail,...I can't believe you went after the bug with all of those things! And those bugs usually run so fast that they are almost impossible to catch,...you must be quick girl!

I HATE bugs! Yikes! The picture even gives me the willys.

This was a funny blog post. It shows a whole different side of you my dear. The agressive side. (smile)

I think it is funny that you named this dead bug,...what a hoot!
Love, Grams

Sally-Ann said...

Ah....a girl after my own heart! I probably would have thrown in a few wacks with a rolled up newspaper for good measure. Calvin was a very big bug. Florida is full of creepy crawlies - I have a bug man come every 3 months.
Thanks for the laugh!!!

Laura Hoekstra-Bettig said...

Abigail, you are such a delightful young lady! I enjoyed your little story of Calvin. And you are right, there are no innocent bugs, no not one! So hack away if they mess with you! Thanks for stopping by my "house" today. See you next week!

Kristin said...

Ewwww! As my 2 year old would say, "So Gross!" LOL

I love all of your extermination products! hahahaha!!!

Sharon said...

Haha :-D. When I was little, I used to squish ants and sniff them (I loved their smell). No more.

But that was a funny story!

Olivia said...

haha! That's great! I was/am the same way too. After I got over my initial fear of bugs (I called all bugs "ladybugs" and were freaked out by them) I really enjoyed playing with worms... I'm still not afraid of bugs, I just don't like them. :)

Lexi said...

Ok, laughing out loud!!!

That is way too funny!

If I saw a bug crawling into my drink, I would have probably done the same thing! LOL

RIP CALVIN

Hope you are doing well!

Lexi

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